March 5th, 2010 By Kevin Ngo
“Am I here to win or lose? What kind of question is that?” This is what you are probably wondering after reading the title but what I am about to share with you will probably shock you and maybe even disturb you a bit.
Who goes into anything with the intent to lose? We all want to be winners right? Of course! Unless if you have some sort of side bet or want to make someone feel better, you definitely want to be successful at whatever it is you are trying to accomplish. Well, I am here to tell you that this is not always the case.
Let me ask you a question. Let’s say you are in a race. Is there a difference between wanting to get first place and NOT wanting to get last place? Sure there is. One will lead you to a trophy if you succeed while the other will just make you feel good that did not end up last. Although this may seem silly, many people operate this way all the time.
Let me ask you another question. Which of these two scenarios will you work harder at: Increasing your market value to earn an extra $10,000 or prevent someone from stealing or scamming you out of $10,000? The fact is that most people will work harder to prevent from losing what they already have than to go for what they want.
Do you think you will have a greater chance of making more money, for example, if all you did was hold onto your savings and not invest it because of the fear of losing it opposed to taking some calculated risk to invest and multiply your net worth? Many people go into things, be it a business, some opportunity, an investment, or competition, with the focus on not losing.
Realize that there is a huge difference between focusing on winning and focusing on not losing. You see, whether or not you are focusing on losing or not losing, you are still focusing on the concept of losing. You know the saying: “You get what you focus on.” You actually increase the odds of losing even when you focus on not losing. If this is the case, then doesn’t it make sense to focus on winning?
Do you think someone like Tiger Woods goes into a golf tournament hoping to not get last place? Of course not! In fact, Tiger said if he didn’t think he would win, he would not even play. The people who succeed in getting everything they want in life, approach everything with the attitude that says, “I will be the best and will not settle for anything less.”
If you just realized that you have been going through life and attempting to achieve your goals from a place of fear, then you need to make a decision right now to believe in yourself. There really isn’t an option here. When you focus on not being last, you will most likely get second to last. Why cheat yourself out of being first? By doing that, you will have decided you’re not going to win even when the race hasn’t started yet.
So, are you here to win or lose? Are you going to step up and take charge of your life once and for all or are you going to settle for the crumbs the winners in life leave behind? Everyone wants to win. No one wants to lose. But if you focus on not losing, you probably won’t lose, but you will definitely not win either. Now that you know this, there is no turning back.
Until next time…
Love Life. Do Good. Live Well.